How to Handle a Narcissist from Space
Respond to his self-serving praise with a thumbs up.
Say nothing.
Twiddle your thumbs.
Fiddle with the floating mic with your friends:
Stand it up, lay it down, watch it drift, spin it like a drill.
Clap and laugh like kids at these antics while he waits.
Use comm delay to your innocent advantage.
Let him sit in silence a full minute.
Pretend to wonder if you lost contact.
Ask if ground is still on the line.
I am, yes, I am, says the narcissist.
Listen to the crowd laugh on your beautiful planet.
Do not apologize.
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